Navigating Unfair Expectations: Confronting My In-Laws’ Treatment and Seeking Support from My Husband

A woman, employed as a remote worker, resided with her in-laws to assist in caring for her ailing father-in-law and manage household tasks. Facing challenges and feeling isolated from her own family and friends, she sought advice on Reddit due to growing dissatisfaction with her living situation.

Initially, she and her husband had moved in to support her father-in-law’s health needs. As his condition improved, the woman found herself burdened with various responsibilities. She detailed the financial contributions she and her husband made, including covering groceries, utilities, and shared costs for house upgrades. She managed cooking, cleaning, and pet care, with the understanding that the house would eventually be passed down to them.

However, resentment grew as she felt overworked while her husband and in-laws relaxed after work. Tensions reached a breaking point when, while unwell, she was expected to prepare dinner and do additional cleaning. Despite expressing her concerns to her husband, the situation did not improve. Seeking advice on Reddit, users suggested she consider leaving the house or even her husband.

In a later update, three months after her initial post, the woman revealed significant changes. She decided to secure her financial independence by transferring her wages to a private account and separating her savings from the joint account with her husband. Two weeks after the initial post, she discovered she was pregnant, which triggered further issues with her in-laws.

Her parents-in-law began making decisions about the baby’s future without consulting her, including suggesting names and designs for the nursery. Feeling like an incubator, the woman reached her breaking point when her mother-in-law criticized her choices while shopping for baby items. Despite discussing her concerns with her husband three times, he offered excuses rather than solutions.

Having conversed with her unresponsive husband, the woman decided to relocate and initiate divorce proceedings. She opted to live in closer proximity to her family, intending to bring up her discovered daughter among her numerous cousins. The Reddit community expressed satisfaction that the woman had taken steps to extricate herself from the unhealthy situation.

As for what I would do in her situation, it’s a personal decision that depends on various factors. Each individual’s circumstances, values, and priorities differ, so there isn’t a one-size-fits-all answer. Some might choose to address the issues in the marriage and attempt reconciliation, while others may prioritize their well-being and decide to end the relationship, even during pregnancy. Ultimately, it’s crucial to consider one’s own emotional and physical health, as well as the well-being of any children involved.

The woman’s mother-in-law missed the gender reveal due to her behavior, while another mother-in-law who did attend faced criticism for allegedly spoiling the moment.