Reacting to the Chaos Created by My Adult Stepdaughter and Her Kids in Our Home

In an effort to blend their families, a woman and her husband decided to live together, but tensions between her and her stepdaughter strained their relationship. Eventually, an incident led to one of them having to move out. The wife took to Reddit to share their situation, explaining that she married her husband when his daughter Trudi was 22 years old; Trudi is now 36. The Original Poster (OP) has two college-aged children, aged 18 and 20.

Trudi’s parents had divorced six years prior to the OP and her husband meeting, yet their relationship with Trudi was rocky right from the start. Despite Trudi being an independent adult with her own mother and living responsibly on her own, the Redditor didn’t expect Trudi to warm up to her.

Unexpected circumstances led to the two women sharing a living space. Trudi and her husband faced financial challenges, prompting them to move in with the OP and her husband. The Reddit user mentioned that, given they lived in a popular tourist area, she opted to use her former apartment for short-term rentals instead of selling it off.

Despite reaching an agreement to assist Trudi and her family by allowing them to move into the unoccupied flat after the holidays without paying rent initially, the OP’s experience living with Trudi was far from ideal. She found it frustrating that Trudi didn’t take responsibility for cleaning up after herself or her children, a sentiment echoed by an observer on Reddit who noted Trudi’s husband’s efforts despite his exhaustion from long hours at work.

Despite discussions between the OP and her husband about these issues, as well as conversations with Trudi and her children, no changes occurred. The only one making an effort, according to the OP, was her son-in-law. Trudi bluntly stated, “I live in her father’s house,” implying she didn’t feel obliged to follow the OP’s rules. The OP lamented her husband’s lack of support in addressing the situation once more.

Fed up with the ongoing conflicts with her stepdaughter, the OP made the decision to move out of the house and into her newly acquired flat. Trudi’s lack of care for her possessions solidified the OP’s resolve not to allow her to stay in the flat.

This decision sparked anger from everyone, including her husband, except for her son-in-law, who understood her frustration. Despite Trudi threatening legal action, a Reddit user pointed out that she had no grounds to do so since she hadn’t paid a deposit as stipulated in the lease agreement.

After spending a week in the flat, the OP found solace in its tranquility and cleanliness. Despite her husband’s pleas to return to their original arrangement, the OP remained firm in her decision to stay in the flat.

Upon inspecting the house, the OP found it in an appalling state, emitting an unpleasant odor akin to a dwelling inhabited by unsupervised teenage boys, according to her description. Trudi promptly made excuses, shifting blame and claiming the mess was a result of her lack of a proper living space. Feeling disheartened, the OP returned to her flat, unconvinced by Trudi’s explanations.

Despite her reluctance to live with her stepdaughter, the OP proposed to her husband that he move into the flat with her. However, he preferred to remain in his own home, being retired and enjoying his independence. The OP made it clear that she would only return to the house if Trudi and her family vacated it.

Commenters on Reddit sympathized with the OP’s distress, many criticizing her husband for allowing his daughter’s behavior and failing to support his wife.

Other people felt compassion for the son-in-law as well. There was a widespread belief among readers that he had already been accustomed to dealing with Trudi’s behaviour, and that this circumstance just brought to light the imbalance that existed in their relationship. The Reddit user, on the other hand, was given the advice by internet users to remain in her flat and let her husband handle his kid until he could no longer handle it.